Will vegans bully me into changing my name next?

We’re not even allowed to say ‘mutton’ any more, apparently – or ‘wool’

Vegan protesters say we should choose ‘cruelty-free’ products instead of wool and even want the village of Wool to change its name (Rex Features)

Vegans are increasingly vociferous, and they’ve scored a PR triumph in York, where a pub formerly known as the Shoulder of Mutton for over 60 years has just been renamed the Heworth Inn, apparently in the hope of attracting non-meat-eating customers.

A third of the menu at the refurbished Heworth Inn features meat-free dishes, although they still serve steak. According to a manager at the pub, the name Shoulder of Mutton wasn’t just offputting to vegans: it could deter new brides from booking the premises (he cited the expression “mutton dressed as lamb”).

Are we really that sensitive these days? How can anyone could be offended by the word “mutton”, a tasty traditional meat from a lamb which has led a decent life? Does this mean that other pubs will follow suit and anywhere called the Cheshire Cheese (for example) might face a picket line, because some vegans reckon the dairy industry is an abomination?

The vegan crusade shows no signs of abating. Animal welfare campaigners have written to the residents of Wool in Dorset, offering them “cruelty-free vegan blankets” if they change the name of their village, claiming that it’s cruel to shear sheep. They seem to be ignorant of the fact that “wool” is a medieval word which has nothing to do with sheep, but derives from the term for water. My maiden name was Janet Bull – what cruelty-free products are on offer if I change it to Janet Soya Bean or Janet Beetroot?