yesterday was...

a good day for:

Ufologists, with several sightings in Malaysia of a spaceship, "the size of a football field and several storeys high", occupied by extra-terrestrials with long ears and little red eyes.

a bad day for:

Frederick Chiluba, the president of Zambia, whose new desk, described as an expensive executive model, was stolen from a freight train on its way to Lusaka. The desk was recovered from the bush, but its legs had been removed, possibly, it was suggested, by wild animals building a lair.