SOMETHING FOR THE MILLENNIUM, SIR?
A new contraceptive device went on sale this week. The Persona measures female hormone levels in the urine and gives `traffic light' signals as to whether it's safe to proceed or not
Like a small computer
In a case for specs
It's a traffic signal
For directing sex
Buy it in your chemist's
Pop it in your bag
Stick it in the bathroom
Green means shag.
Free of nasty hormones
Hardly ever fails
Catholic approval
Guarantees the sales
Goodbye, padlocked boudoir
Icy showers and chess
Monsignor Del Monte
He says "Yes".
Nearly safe as condoms
When the light is on
And of course this gismo
Will not choke a swan
Batteries included
Fifty quid a shot
Are they on prescription?
No, they're not.
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