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Mark Steel

Mark Steel is a stand-up comedian, radio presenter and Independent columnist. He enjoys writing his column because no one ever takes it literally.

Who cares if Boris is incompetent if he’s ‘plain-speaking’, right?

It’s the same with builders: you don’t want them bamboozling you with terms like ‘making good’ and ‘dovetail joint’ – it’s much better to have a plain-speaking one that says, ‘I’ve accidentally smashed your wall down’

We’ve given Trump the royal treatment so why not bung him the NHS too?

We must deal with the president of the US, we’re told. But you also have to deal with your energy supplier, and you don’t invite the board of EDF over for a sodding banquet

Who cares about food? Brexit is Britain’s best ever entertainment show

Every detail seems designed to make Britain look gloriously stupid

The handling of Windrush is so bad, maybe it’s Chris Grayling’s fault

Taking almost a year over one claimant clearly means they must be making absolutely sure they give them exactly the right amount